True Life: I Hoard Office Supplies

Y'all already know that I'm obsessed with office supplies.

Last night I finally got around to pulling out my trusty Rubbermaid of office supplies so I could organize my new desk at work and add some of my own personality to it. As I was going through everything trying to decide what to take with me and what to leave at home, I found myself being super stingy about the pens, highlighters, post-its and paper clips that I was willing to take to work. I forced myself to take SOME of my favorite things with me and then I packed the rest away again to save for a better day.

Then today as I was unpacking everything at work I found myself putting my pretty supplies in drawers and stocking the top of my desk with the drab, plain supplies that the center provided for me. Whenever I had to write something down, I used the boring yellow post-its instead of my flower post-its. I used the plain black pens instead of my favorite purple pen. I shoved the striped paperclips to the bottom of the holder so I wouldn't waste them on petty stacks of paper.

Why in the world do I refuse to use the simple things that bring me so much joy? As ridiculous as I KNOW this is, I'm afraid to use them because I fear that I might not be able to replace them when they run out.

Take for instance this photo that I took of some of my favorites last fall...

Every single one of those items remains in the exact same condition today (except the ugly light yellow post-its). Not a single use since that day. But you'd better believe that they're tucked safely into my desk for the day when a task is so important that it's worthy of their use. Until then, I'll continue to use the "uglier" post-its.

I have a favorite purple pen. I wouldn't use it. I ordered 3 more off of Amazon because I figured I would be allowed to use it if I had back-ups. Now I won't use the back-ups. 

What if one day I'm 97 years old and I have all of these beautiful office supplies in Rubbermaids that went bad because I was too scared to use them? What if I spend my whole life using ugly office supplies because of my fear of running out of the pretty ones?